Author: Ian

Operating from Stratford upon Avon the Stratfordian/Ian Harris will show off his artwork, write short stories and offer up heart-felt opinions about anything that takes his fancy.

A Health Update

The silence in our house that (I described in my last post-One car family) is slowly breaking down and is now punctuated by the odd ‘good morning’ or stuff that doesn’t crack the ice too much.

All this accompanied by a scowl or a frown either from me (I confess), or her. In all our years of marriage (54 years – Holy mackerel) this present outbreak must rank in the top ten. The hate, the anger is palpable. Thank God we live in a country where weaponry is hard to come by (actually there is always the kitchen).

Anyway…did I mention I am on a diet? I didn’t? In that case, let me give you a health update (bear with me).

The diabetes (type 2) is insidious. It’s a nasty bastard that eats you up from the inside out and it looks like it’s having a good go at me now. Reports from the front are telling me that my kidneys are ‘leaking’ i.e. not doing what they should be doing with proteins.

All this was discovered because I noticed that there hadn’t been any reference from those in the know of late to those naughty (failing?) kidneys. There had been previous reports of dodgy behaviour on the part of these necessary organs some years ago but I, and others had not followed through.  I should say that I accept some responsibility because I haven’t turned up to my yearly diabetes check up with a bottle of pee to be looked at for some time.

Anyway, to cut a long story short, I did this time and mentioned to my lovely doctor that it was some time since I had an actual report on the state of the kidneys. She leapt into doctorly action, and the pee was sent off to Pee Central. We waited.

When the report came back it was, on the dark side. It was not good, and (if I survive) it looks like I will be going onto a new drug in the very near future…. oh yes, the diet.

I had read somewhere that type two diabetes can be reversed with diet, so determined to beat this nasty fucker that is what I chose to do.

Diet, diet, diet.

Amazingly I lost 5lbs in just as many days… and then disappointedly it stopped. I was left very slightly thinner with a bunged-up feeling I put down to too much Slim-Fast.

Fast-forward, I’ve dropped the Slim-Fast but am still dieting and regulating what I eat with sheer willpower.

Unfortunately I haven’t had the courage to get back on the weighing machine as I feel depressed enough already what with Gaza, the idiot trump and the UK knuckle-draggers who come out from under their stones every (hot) summer to complain, threaten and scare anyone who is different than them, i.e. not fat, not bald and has a vocab of more than 10 words oh yes, and dress sense.

I shall keep you informed.

One car family

We have a blackboard in the kitchen because we are a one car family.

The blackboard enables each of us, me, my son and my wife to chalk up who is doing what on a particular day. This supposedly stops each of us clashing in the use of the one car. Most of the times it works, but now and again things get confusing. Usually because of simple things like bad, by that I mean undecipherable, handwriting, but as I said, most of the time it works.

Rosie: Mums at 11.00.

Seems clear enough.

‘Mum’ (100) is Rosie’s mother and at her great age things are slowly…well, slowing down. She sleeps most of the time, is bed-ridden and I think it is fair to say semi-conscious. She is in no pain; she eats and drinks but sadly that is about it. Conversation and even her avid TV watching is sadly, gone forever.

For the past few years, she has been well catered for in a local home for the elderly. She has her own flat, with her own furniture. She has friends and has for some time lived a comfortable life. Unfortunately, as she hit her 100th, in fact just before, things changed dramatically and to cut a long story short she has had to be moved from the home for the elderly to a nursing home.

Her flat is now empty, and her daughters are having to face the inevitable. Preparations are being made for what is, everybody knows, to come.

The point I’m trying to make here is, everybody, especially the close family, i.e. Rosie and her two sisters are under a lot of stress. Emotions are to the fore and tensions are running high.

Which takes me back to the message on the blackboard.

Rosie: Mums at 11.00.

(This gets complicated but stick with me).

We were running slightly late but as I had to deliver a sample to my doctors which was on the way (NOT), I offered to drive.

Pee delivered I proceeded to head for Mums. Except as it turned out, right Mum, wrong place.

I was headed well on the way to the nursing home when Rosie suddenly said, ‘You know we’re going to the home for the elderly right’?

Slightly annoyed, it was when I replied something to the effect, ‘but the message on the board said, ‘Mum’s (i.e. the nursing home – i.e. where Mum actually IS) at 11.00’. (Not the home for the elderly where Mum actually, WASN’T), that all hell broke loose.

*Apparently, I was supposed to know that the message referred to where she wasn’t and NOT to where she IS.

At this point I should perhaps make it clear that ‘Mum (s)’ was not involved in this debacle at all. It was nothing to do with my dear old Mother-in-Law, no this was to do with the sisters meeting at 11.00 where Mum used to be (her empty flat), to go through her personal items.

Anyway, if you are still following this…

…to cut another long story short and in an effort to keep this piece clean by leaving out the obscene language…

Have you ever had one of those all-mighty screaming and shouting matches while mobile. Dangerous to say the least. How we arrived at the er…destination (where Mum wasn’t) without being involved in a major road accident I do not know.

This happened two days ago, and we have yet to speak to each other.

IFH.

 

*Mind reader

I should be in my shed, painting.

I should be in my shed, painting.

Unfortunately, Donald J Trump has taken up residency in my head, rent free. The unfathomable plight of the American people and why they have allowed HIM to happen consumes me…anyway…this…

It’s obvious that I am not the only one in these here parts to be watching in astonishment as America eats itself. Things have got so bad that the jokes about ‘the orange one’ etc are no longer funny.

So much so, that the TV shows that are brave enough to criticise the President by showing never ending clips of his ridiculous statements or behaviour, are in my opinion becoming tired and ineffective. Once upon a time, humour was a powerful weapon that could be relied upon to slow down the progress of the most powerful wannabe dictator. Not anymore. They have cracked all the jokes, shown all the videos and the Fool is still there.

Trump is as he is portrayed. Stupid and dangerous.

The radio and TV stations of sensible America is merely telling the truth as it is and thereby have lost any barbs it might have had. It can tell its audience nothing new about its corrupt President. The time has come to stop laughing. The ‘joke’ is over. Time to get serious America. Time to get serious or die.

Trump is as mad as a box of frogs.

Trump is a conman.

Trump is a narcissist.

Trump is greedy and a grifter.

It’s all been said and it’s all true. It therefore follows that the truth because of its constant repetition, holds no longer holds shock value.

The surprise, the step back in ‘shock/horror’ effect has dissipated.  The TV stations are merely telling their audience what they already know.

In short, main street media has lost its edge and are now merely feeding the masses who hate Trump with what they want and expect to hear. And it is these feelings of audience self-righteousness and the ‘told you so’ effect that is keeping them from rising in anger from their over-stuffed sofas. They are too ‘comfortable’ and under the mistaken allusion that the TV companies will fight the battle for them. They need to wake up and organise before it is too late. Which it might be already.

What also amazes me is the sycophantic Republican party and their complete lack of realisation that they cannot go on like this.

Their day, (sooner rather than later one hopes), will most definitely come and no amount of money and guns will save them from the fury of the crowd, or should I say, mob.

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