I think there are a couple of things a person has to take on board if they truly want to know who they are.
The first thing do is drop any pretence.
& FACE YOURSELF.
…and to do that you have to be on the outside looking in. You have to develop the ability to look at yourself as though through the eyes of another. You have to be willing to point out the things that you don’t like about yourself.
Are you impatient? Then acknowledge it.
Are you liable to exaggerate – then admit it.
Are you full of fear – don’t be afraid to say so.
The point being that the human being (YOU), is a mass of contradictions.
It’s OK. It’s our experiences in life have made us what we are. It’s not your fault for within that life is the truth that the ‘damaged’ person (YOU) is constantly adjusting. Constantly working at ways to improve. Always on the go. Working to make oneself, ‘better’.
That, I believe is a given.
Although we may not consciously be working to improve we know in our hearts and head that the way we are at any given moment can be improved. We are in short, ‘A WORK IN PROGRESS’. And that work can take all of our lives. Our ‘self-healing’ and that is the marvellous thing about being human we can ‘repair’, is a long term job. Upon saying that, there are of course, for various reasons some who have, sometimes through no fault of their own or by choice have buried the mechanism that enables us ‘improvement’.
2. RULES. BE CAREFUL OF SOCIETY’S RULES.
Of course every society needs its rules and laws. Without any kind of framework to guide and lead us, there will come, chaos.
I believe that most of those rules are within us. They are what make us human and allow us to survive (flight or fight) and live a life.
Some rules we are born with. Others become part of us as we grow and become part of the society and culture we live and become used to. We accept, wrongly or rightly our ‘way of life’.
But this does not mean that rules cannot be changed.
Rules can in my view, ‘wear out’. As we become shall we say, more sophisticated and knowledgeable we will know that some rules have outstayed their welcome and either need to be tinkered with or dispensed with entirely. Good examples of this are the rules that govern our sexuality and who we are allowed to be.
As time has gone on, we have become more aware that the human race is a jigsaw of parts that like any jigsaw can be pieced together to make, a complete picture. However, its a jigsaw that is continually being added to.
As the years, decades go by we are constantly being surprised on how many more pieces it takes to form the human race…and its not over yet. More parts/peices of the puzzle are yet to be revealed. More surprises await us and more ‘rules’ will have to be changed or dispensed with to make way for our complex and myriad lives. A society or culture that cannot look at itself and right its wrongs WILL eventually self-destruct.
BRAVERY (and the conquering of fear- see above).
Society only ever changes because of the actions of the few.
Most of us WILL NOT BE THE ONE who steps forward. Those with that kind of courage are few and far between. Most of us are sheep. We follow the flock…but that’s OK…as long…
…as long as we are aware that there will come a time when we will be needed and have to raise our heads above the parapet…but even then it will be too much for most of us.
The trouble is if we do nothing. If we refuse to put our mark on the ballot paper or join the march or the strike we could find ourselves on the losing side and more in the open and at risk than we ever thought we would be.
The point being that it is almost impossible to stay silent.
By this I don’t mean you have to wave a flag or express your view through a loud hailer. The truth is, total silence can be construed as you being, complicit.
I believe, you/we live our lives in conjunction/ in connection with others.
Whether we like it or not, I believe our lives are intertwined. We can watch from the side-lines, and we can believe that what we see has nothing to do with us and will not in the long run affect us. That is a mistaken belief.
The rules and laws that are made to keep a part of the human race down and controlled, touch us all.
We can of course, state openly that ‘WE DON’T CARE’ about what happens to others and go on about our lives in complete ignorance. The refusal to even try to understand what it like to be in another’s shoes, to my mind makes those that think like that, LESS.
Sure they will survive and there will be no retribution or come back of any sort but they will be, empty vessels. A non-contributors. Taking up valuable space. Fleshy, empty, bags of useless bones.